Once again, there’s a court case about some folks moving to local community and suing the town and the neighbors, I guess because they believe they own some land that has been used by the public for quite a while. This is a wonderful business for attorneys because it always drags out for a long time and nobody wins, except them.

I’ve interacted with a lot of visitors this summer who remarked about how friendly everyone in the area is. Friendliness is a quality that is highly valued in this part of the world. For a lot of people, they don’t have much else, so being friendly is a pretty special gift that they can give. I can see how someone with a good deal of resources could decide to buy a property on or near the water for a summer home and enjoy the friendliness. 

Here’s the problem. If you want to benefit from the friendliness, you need to be friendly. If your property was used for beach parties every night by young adults old enough to buy beer, you made a bad purchase.

If responsible people cross your property from time to time to access a nice beach or waterfront area, it shouldn’t be a big deal. If a dog or two drops a present on your land, thank the heavens that you are living in a place that is that close to nature. Before you arrived, people just did what they did and it was not an issue. Nobody was intentionally trespassing to cause a situation; it was just all right.

Now, you’ve changed the rules and you’re upset that the other players don’t want to play by your rules. So you do what you know. You sue. Now you’ve made things even worse. Let me explain a little more.

When you sue a town, all the residents have to pay for the defense and taxes are already high enough in most towns, so that’s not something the taxpayers are going to feel all warm and fuzzy about. You started out being unfriendly to a few neighbors or visitors and now you’ve become unfriendly to most everyone in town. In your world, you probably are saying, “That’s OK. I’m right, and I’ll prove it and I’ll win.”

You will not win. You may win a lawsuit, but trust me, you will not win.

That friendliness that you noticed on your visits here means that most everyone knows everyone else. I recently had a situation that involved getting something done on one of the islands. Not having met the owners involved, my first question was, “Will people on the island help these folks?”

It had nothing to do with how much money they had, it had to do with what kind of neighbors they were. We would have accomplished what we had to do one way or another, but the cost to the end user would have been much higher if they were not good neighbors.

So when you think you have some unique lawsuit between you and a small town or you and a few neighbors who have lived here in peace for years or generations, what is really happening is word is getting around and all the people you need to do things for your will be busy and not available to help you out no matter how much money you have.

Most of the people who put themselves in these situations only live here a few months a year. And some don’t even live here all the time during those few months. So why be so uptight?

There’s always two ways to look at everything:

Maine, the Way Life Should Be. That’s what the sign says at the border. If you’re in the way-life-should-be mode, you’ll say something like this at the cocktail parties back home: “I bought an oceanfront property in Maine. It’s gorgeous. In fact, it’s so special that people I don’t even know come by to enjoy it every day. And you can’t believe how wonderful my neighbors are. I am blessed.”

Or, if you’re in your hometown mode you’ll say something like: “I bought my dream home in Maine and people don’t understand me or why I want to protect my privacy, but I’ve hired a great attorney. The facts are on our side and we’re going to win this lawsuit no matter what it costs.”

Here’s how it ends. Win or lose, you will not feel comfortable and after a time, you’ll sell your dream property in Maine and buy a dream property somewhere else.

All the time that your were miserable, your neighbors just kept doing what they do and the rest of the people in the town that you sued just kept doing what they do. Your feelings were hurt, but there’s good news! Your attorney has done very well and there’s a similar property for sale at a bargain price that the owner wants to unload because he or she is tired of fighting for everything and your attorney can afford it.

Sorry Maine didn’t work out for you.